tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-11-22:/a lot can happen in one year ...MokoFeed2009-11-22T17:27:19+01:00tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-04-06:/2009/04/06/face-job-5900568/kevinwilson2009-04-06T18:24:57+02:002009-04-06T18:24:57+02:00 <p>ok - you have to pretend that you are in the MMIX cosmetic surgery.<br>doctor kev is waiting to see you and he has a special offer on.</p> <p>(steady ... )</p> <p>you can change one thing about your face and he will fix it for you, for free.</p> <p>so what would you have done??</p> <p><span>(i'm not trying to say you actually NEED anything doing, obviously.<br>but you might just have one or two small imperfections, like a nose the size of a two pound loaf or something.<br>er ... if you do have a large nose, i hope you weren't offended by what i just said there...<br>er... i think that's the end of the apologies.<br>sorry.)</span></p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/04/06/face-job-5900568/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-04-06:/2009/04/06/boring-lists-5899363/kevinwilson2009-04-06T14:11:36+02:002009-04-06T14:11:36+02:00 <p>i am considering a complete ban on pointless surveys and lists for MMIX.<br>after all, we want 2009 to be a positive year, a year of change, don't we?</p> <p>so telling us that luton, slough and lincolnshire are possibly the most boring places in the world, isn't helping much.</p> <p><span>(is it true, by the way?)</span></p> <p>having cheap laughs at other people's expense is just not on.<br><span>unless i'm doing it.</span></p> <p>the only list i want to see from now on is a list of happy, smiling people.</p> <p>like this ....</p> <p><img src="http://www.blog.co.uk/image/smileys/05biggrin.gif" alt=""></p> <p> </p> <p> </p> <p> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/04/06/boring-lists-5899363/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-04-04:/2009/04/04/improvements-5887865/kevinwilson2009-04-04T12:02:31+02:002009-04-04T12:02:31+02:00 <p>amazing the number of people who seem to be chopping down trees and smashing down walls and having skips delivered.</p> <p>the world is alive with the scream of chain saws, the roar of the bulldozer, and the tinny racket of radio one, all in the name of home improvement.</p> <p>this is the spring clean, 21st century style, i suppose.</p> <p>give me a floral apron and a feather duster any time ....</p> <p>ooops, giving away a bit too much there, i think ...</p> <p>is it too late to retract that remark?</p> <p>ah.</p> <p>ok.</p> <p>(puts on deepest voice...)</p> <p><em>just my little joke, you understand.  give me a hammer drill and a pair of dickies work trousers any time.</em></p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/04/04/improvements-5887865/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-04-03:/2009/04/03/x-files-5886012/kevinwilson2009-04-03T22:32:30+02:002009-04-03T22:32:30+02:00 <p>so farewell then, mulder and scully.<br>just seen the latest and probably last x files movie as they sat in their little rowing boat heading towards a happy ever after life on a desert island.</p> <p>they both looked a bit on the old and tired side.<br>this suggests to me that i must look much the same, since i've been with them since series one.</p> <p>they've finally realised that the truth really is out there, and they are more likely to find it by living a quiet life on their island.</p> <p>which is what i've done.</p> <p>spooky.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/04/03/x-files-5886012/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-04-03:/2009/04/03/weekend-one-5885030/kevinwilson2009-04-03T19:14:48+02:002009-04-03T19:14:48+02:00 <p>what one thing are you determined to do this weekend?</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/04/03/weekend-one-5885030/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-04-03:/2009/04/03/shooting-stars-5884132/kevinwilson2009-04-03T16:02:30+02:002009-04-03T16:02:30+02:00 <p>now, i did say MMIX was going to be a good year, didn't i?</p> <p>well it just got even better.</p> <p>now we can look forward to a new series of 'shooting stars' - this autumn.</p> <p>don't ask me why, but i loved the series when it was first shown.  essential viewing, i thought.</p> <p><img src="http://www.blog.co.uk/image/smileys/01arrow.gif" alt=""> if i was doing my own version, there are several stars i'd be tempted to shoot.<br>it would make a nice alternative to the 'room 101' concept, wouldn't it?<br>pick three stars that you would like to shoot ...</p> <p>tricky, eh?</p> <p>not.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/04/03/shooting-stars-5884132/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-04-03:/2009/04/03/g20-5882980/kevinwilson2009-04-03T12:23:27+02:002009-04-03T12:23:27+02:00 <p>i have it on good authority that barack obama had to ask what G20 was when he was tucking into egg and chips on air force one, two miles over the pond, on his way to little old london.</p> <p>you see, he thought he was going to the launch of google's new mobile phone and he and his aides were all hoping for lots of freebies to go with the new half a billion dollar cadillac he had flown over with him.</p> <p>as it is, he's had to put up with meeting folk like the queen - who thought he had wind, until someone pointed out that he always smiled a lot.  and gordon brown, who loves him so much i gather they're sleeping together tonight.</p> <p>there are strong rumours that boris johnson, the mayor of london, is so fed up with the cost and inconvenience of the summit meeting that he has told his traffic wardens to wheelclamp barack's car.</p> <p>you read it here first.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/04/03/g20-5882980/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-04-03:/2009/04/03/spring-resolutions-5882437/kevinwilson2009-04-03T10:47:46+02:002009-04-03T10:47:46+02:00 <p>this is the time of year for a clear out, isn't it?</p> <p>i've made a start on my computer desk which now looks half decent - apart from some chocolate hobnob crumbs, that is.</p> <p>but where next?</p> <p>then i had a brainwave ... <img src="http://www.blog.co.uk/image/smileys/icon_wave.gif" alt=""></p> <p>this would be a much better to make resolutions, wouldn't it?  a lot better than new year anyway, when people do it to relieve the boredom and avoiding the washing up.</p> <p>a sort of spring clean of the brain.  that's it.<br>spring resolutions ...</p> <p>back later when i've written them down.</p> <p>if only i could find me pencil.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/04/03/spring-resolutions-5882437/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-04-02:/2009/04/02/bare-chested-or-not-5879880/kevinwilson2009-04-02T20:51:28+02:002009-04-02T20:51:28+02:00 <p>i just want you to know that i'm not taking my vest off (well, it's a t shirt really).</p> <p>i've seen a wide variety of idiots today - mainly men who are old enough to know better - strutting their stuff in shorts and bare chests, sucking their bellies in frantically as they soak up the sun, while walking the dog or fetching the paper.<br>it's not even that warm!</p> <p>anyone know why they do it?<br>is to attract attention?  is it to show how hard they are?  <br>are they bored and this is a way of adding interest to their lives?</p> <p>anyway, i need to know you think of it.</p> <p>should i rethink and get me kit off?</p> <p>is it cooler to keep your shirt on?</p> <p>or is the sad truth that i am a wimp ...</p> <p>(sulks)</p> <p> </p> <p> </p> <p> </p> <p> </p> <p> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/04/02/bare-chested-or-not-5879880/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-04-02:/2009/04/02/new-look-5878741/kevinwilson2009-04-02T17:08:12+02:002009-04-02T17:08:12+02:00 <p>my hair needs trimming.<br>it's getting wild and out of control.<br>a bit like me.</p> <p>i was so out of control today, i almost raised my voice!<br>yes, really!</p> <p>anyway, the hair i am gamely hanging onto - the bit on top - has grown and when the wind is blowing, it ends up in various configurations.  today, after the dog walk, it looked like a badly fitting flat hat.  this afternoon, after riding the bike to the allotment, it looked like a rather weak tidal wave.  on a good day, it  looks suspiciously like one of those paper boats i used to make when i was a kid,</p> <p>and i need a shave.</p> <p>but what if i just let my hair and my beard grow...</p> <p>maybe it's time to rebel.</p> <p>but maybe there are better ways to rebel?</p> <p>any advice, gratefully received!</p> <p> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/04/02/new-look-5878741/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-04-02:/2009/04/02/love-5876755/kevinwilson2009-04-02T10:40:49+02:002009-04-02T10:40:49+02:00 <p>a true story to warm the heart of your cockles as springtime comes to MMIX ...</p> <p>a nice, quiet middle aged lady works every day at the village post office.<br>she's pleasant and smiley to every customer.<br>just a few yards down the road, a nice, smiley gentleman is bereaved when his wife dies suddenly.</p> <p>he grieves.<br>she serves.</p> <p>after a while, they meet.</p> <p>they get together.</p> <p>now the two happy, smiley, nice people are a couple, and they are even happier and smilier than they were before.</p> <p><img src="http://www.blog.co.uk/image/smileys/01arrow.gif" alt=""> it's not the sort of story you often get to hear about - but it does just go to show that the world can be a wonderful place.</p> <p><a title="lovebirds" href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/lovebirds/3373935"><img src="http://data5.blog.de/media/935/3373935_3716faa545_m.jpeg" alt="lovebirds" hspace="5" vspace="5"></a></p> <p> </p> <p> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/04/02/love-5876755/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-04-01:/2009/04/01/nicknames-5874646/kevinwilson2009-04-01T22:23:28+02:002009-04-01T22:23:28+02:00 <p>i need a new nickname.<br>they seem to have dried up.</p> <p>four eyes.<br>that was my usual name at school.</p> <p>alternatively, willy willy wilson.</p> <p>later, when i played football, wazzing up and down the right side of midfield, they called me the ferret.</p> <p>at my first job, they called me cannabis because i was so laid back everyone thought i was on drugs.<br>as i got promoted, and managed staff, i guess most of the names they called me began with bast.</p> <p>now, though, i need a new nickname for 2009.</p> <p>and i am in the unusual position of asking if anyone could suggest one.</p> <p>i just know i'm going to regret it ...</p> <p>but go ahead.  make my day!</p> <p> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/04/01/nicknames-5874646/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-04-01:/2009/04/01/my-set-up-5873538/kevinwilson2009-04-01T18:42:39+02:002009-04-01T18:42:39+02:00 <p>so, by popular demand (well one of you might be interested), here is what i have as my computer desk set-up ...</p> <p>my main machine is a six year old apple imac, and i also have an old macbook laptop.<br>my computer desk is also home to ...</p> <p>a wireless router<br>a 360 GB hard disk for storing pictures and videos<br>a CD size brown box for all the software CDs and bits<br>a few books on how to do various clever things on the computer<br>an ipod shuffle and a set of fold-up headphones<br>a powerball</p> <p>and sitting on top of the cabinet is a digital radio<br>and some photos</p> <p>oh, and there is a half full tube of original pringles standing next to the hard drive.</p> <p>i got almost all this stuff - apart from the powerball and the pringles - when i set up my own business, and the only thing that has ever let me down has been the wireless router, which seems to reset itself at random intervals.</p> <p><img src="http://www.blog.co.uk/image/smileys/01arrow.gif" alt=""> anyway, enough of that, will you excuse me a minute while i finish off me pringles?</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/04/01/my-set-up-5873538/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-03-31:/2009/03/31/2009-laughs-5866568/kevinwilson2009-03-31T17:29:04+02:002009-03-31T17:29:04+02:00 <p><span><span>Two 90 year old men, </span><span>Mike</span><span> and Joe, have been friends all of their lives<span><span>.</span></span></span><span> </span><span></p> <p>When it's clear that Joe is dying, </span><span>Mike</span><span> visits him every day. One day </span><span>Mike</span><span> says, 'Joe, we both loved footy all our lives, and we played on Saturdays together for so many years. Please do me one favour, when you get to Heaven, somehow you must let me know if there's footy there.'</p> <p>Joe looks up at </span><span>Mike</span><span> from his death bed,' </span><span>Mike</span><span>, you've been my best friend for many years. If it's at all possible, I'll do this favour for you."</p> <p>Shortly after that, Joe passes on. At midnight a couple of nights later, </span><span>Mike</span><span> is awakened by a blinding flash of white light and a voice calling out to him, '</span><span>Mike</span><span>--</span><span>Mike</span><span>.'</p> <p>'Who is it?' Asks </span><span>Mike</span><span> sitting up suddenly. 'Who is it?'</p> <p>'</span><span>Mike</span><span>--it's me, Joe.'</p> <p>'You're not Joe. Joe just died.'</p> <p>'I'm telling you, it's me, Joe,' insists the voice.</p> <p>'Joe! Where are you?'</span><span> <br></span><span><br>'</span><span> </span><span>I'm in Heaven', replies Joe. 'I have some really good news and a little bad news.'</span><span><br></span><span><br>'Tell me the good news first,' says </span><span>Mike</span><span>.</p> <p>The good news,' Joe says,' is that there's footy in Heaven. Better yet, all of our old friends who died before us are here, too. Better than that, we're all young again.</p> <p>'Even better still, it's always Spring time and it never rains or snows. And best of all, we can play footy all we want, and we never get tired.'</span><span><br></span><span><br>'That's fantastic,' says </span><span>Mike</span><span>. 'It's beyond my wildest dreams! So what's the bad news?'</span><span><span><br></span></span><span><br></span><span><span>'</span></span><span>You're in the team for Tuesday.'</span></span></p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/03/31/2009-laughs-5866568/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-03-31:/2009/03/31/mmix-news-5866474/kevinwilson2009-03-31T17:13:37+02:002009-03-31T17:13:37+02:00 <p>i think it might be down to a reduction in advertising, which means there is more room to fill in newspapers.</p> <p>i hope they survive - but i wonder whether writing a story with the following headline is really going to help ...</p> <p>DUNG CATCHES FIRE</p> <p>it wasn't even a trick headline - the story simply reported that a dung heap caught fire and the fire brigade put out 'the blaze' when they were called out by 'a neighbour'.</p> <p>'er hello - i live next door to a dung heap and it's on fire.'</p> <p>'we will be out straight away sir, but don't you think it's time you moved to a more desirable address?'</p> <p><img src="http://www.blog.co.uk/image/smileys/01arrow.gif" alt=""> anyway, let's all do our bit to make sure that 2009 or MMIX is not the year we say goodbye to local newspapers.</p> <p> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/03/31/mmix-news-5866474/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-03-29:/2009/03/29/walking-5855732/kevinwilson2009-03-29T21:51:48+02:002009-03-29T21:51:48+02:00 <p>you know how lots of things are suddenly bad for you, like drinking hot tea, smoking, eating burgers, eating chips, butter, milk, cheese ... and the rest.</p> <p>i'm beginning to wonder if walking is bad for you, too.<br>it may well be a candidate for a MMIX ban.</p> <p>driving might be safer, if today is anything to go by.</p> <p>there's me, walking, minding my own business.<br>then, right in front of me, an army of ramblers (or maybe a riot of ramblers would be a better description).<br>they took up the whole footpath with their wide bodied khaki and metal walking poles and stupid maps on a string round their necks.</p> <p>i wouldn't have minded, but it was the coast path, and one side had a very clear view over the top of a cliff ...</p> <p>it would have been safer for me to lie down and let them walk all over me with their nubuck gortex boots.<br>trying to stand politely to one side didn't work so well.  they seemed annoyed they had to detour off the nice clean path onto<br>nasty dirty grass.</p> <p>anyway, you get the gist.</p> <p>next time, i'll take a 4x4 ...</p> <p> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/03/29/walking-5855732/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-03-29:/2009/03/29/2009-laughs-5854102/kevinwilson2009-03-29T17:21:39+02:002009-03-29T17:21:39+02:00 <p><a title="viagra" href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/viagra/3363555"><img src="http://data5.blog.de/media/555/3363555_233f438ea3_m.jpeg" alt="viagra" hspace="5" vspace="5"></a></p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/03/29/2009-laughs-5854102/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-03-28:/2009/03/28/neighbours-5849113/kevinwilson2009-03-28T18:57:09+01:002009-03-28T18:57:09+01:00 <p>2009 could be the year of the good neighbour.</p> <p>does the spirit of community live on in your street?<br>do you nod, smile and wave and have cups of tea together?<br>what a lovely cosy thought that is ...</p> <p>i was chatting about this with, strangely enough, a neighbour.<br>he must be in his seventies, and i get on ok with him.</p> <p>i hardly ever see him, though, and we were chewing the fat over the great issues of the day, like how his spuds were growing.<br>then he started bemoaning the decline of neighbourliness (which is quite a big word).</p> <p>'people just don't stop and talk any more,' he said. 'it's like no-one cares about anyone else any more.'</p> <p>just then, his next door neighbour rolled up in his car.<br>i turned and smiled and said hello as he walked within two feet of us.<br>but my neighbour turned his back on him, never acknowledged him.</p> <p>so i suppose the moral of the story is - being a good neighbour begins at home.</p> <p>or something.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/03/28/neighbours-5849113/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-03-28:/2009/03/28/i-wonder-5847349/kevinwilson2009-03-28T12:35:57+01:002009-03-28T12:35:57+01:00 <p>... if madonna would like to adopt me?</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/03/28/i-wonder-5847349/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-03-28:/2009/03/28/2009-laughs-5846872/kevinwilson2009-03-28T12:24:59+01:002009-03-28T12:24:59+01:00 <p><a title="2009 " href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/2009/3359799"><img src="http://data5.blog.de/media/799/3359799_b080a8a92d_m.jpeg" alt="2009 " hspace="5" vspace="5"></a></p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/03/28/2009-laughs-5846872/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-03-27:/2009/03/27/2009-laughs-5843119/kevinwilson2009-03-27T18:11:25+01:002009-03-27T18:11:25+01:00 <p><a title="charades" href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/charades/3358073"><img src="http://data5.blog.de/media/073/3358073_cc4dc3abf6_m.jpeg" alt="charades" hspace="5" vspace="5"></a></p> <p>ouch.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/03/27/2009-laughs-5843119/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-03-27:/2009/03/27/fag-science-5840801/kevinwilson2009-03-27T11:16:24+01:002009-03-27T11:18:30+01:00 <p>MMIX has had a swift change of heart.<br>scientists - you are safe - for now.<br>why?<br>well, look what they've come up with ...</p> <p><a title="e-cigarette" href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/e_cigarette/3357119"><img src="http://data5.blog.de/media/119/3357119_183a691be2_m.jpeg" alt="e-cigarette" hspace="5" vspace="5"></a></p> <p>yes, it's the e-cigarette.<br>you just plug it into your computer, it charges it up and you can get the nicotine you need, without the smoke.<br>it just vapourises some chemical that is a solvent of nicotine.</p> <p>now, if they could invent an e-pint, i MIGHT be very interested ...</p> <p> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/03/27/fag-science-5840801/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-03-27:/2009/03/27/tea-science-5840748/kevinwilson2009-03-27T11:03:56+01:002009-03-27T11:03:56+01:00 <p>i'm afraid that 2009 or MMIX will shortly be forced to ban scientific research ...</p> <p>scientists now say that drinking hot tea can be very bad for you.<br>apparently, if your brew is over 70 degrees centigrade it increases your chances of getting cancer of the oesophagus by eight times.</p> <p>however, if you let your tea cool for five minutes, you'll be alright.<br>strangely enough, that was the original advice given by that nice lady mrs beeton decades ago.</p> <p>so all those scientists who spent years having a great time studying tea drinking in northern iran could have just read the mrs beeton cookery book.</p> <p>i rest my case.</p> <p>fancy a brew?</p> <p> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/03/27/tea-science-5840748/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-03-26:/2009/03/26/evolution-5838038/kevinwilson2009-03-26T20:03:25+01:002009-03-26T20:03:25+01:00 <p>2009 - better known as MMIX - could be a very significant year.</p> <p>for pigeons, at least.</p> <p>i watched with all the whispering fervour of david attenborough as five of the rats with wings lumbered down the slipway, and<br>began to paddle in the water...<br>they went in about as far as your dad used to go at the seaside when he rolled his trousers up to reveal two ghostly white legs with spikey stubble, walked purposefully about for about ten seconds, then buggered off back to the deckchair to put the newspaper over his face.</p> <p>but the pigeons went in, and stayed in!<br>you could almost see their little brains thinking ... 'it's cold, but what would happen if i went in a bit deeper.  give those <a href="mailto:f@*^%+">f@*^%+</a> ing ducks a tern for the worse, wouldn't it?'</p> <p>i waited patiently behind the bollard, no doubt attracting the same curious glances as i was giving the pigeons.</p> <p>but never mind.<br>i fully expect 2009 to be the YEAR OF THE AMPHIBIOUS PIGEON.</p> <p>after all, they'll do anything for a bit of bread, won't they?</p> <p>the question is, though, how will the ducks respond...</p> <p>remember, a lot can happen in one year ....</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/03/26/evolution-5838038/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-03-26:/2009/03/26/retro-food-5837090/kevinwilson2009-03-26T16:56:44+01:002009-03-26T16:56:44+01:00 <p>remember beef stroganoff (no, not the russian prime minister - the meal...)</p> <p>well, i actually had some today.</p> <p>beef stroganoff! <br>the chips were as thick as the waiter, but they tasted good, too.</p> <p>all i needed was a slice of black forest gateau and a snowball and i would have had to go to the charity shop for a seventies outfit.</p> <p>alternatively, i suppose i could just open my wardrobe door ...<br>only kidding.</p> <p>my clothes are bang up to date.<br>but i'm not telling you which date.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/03/26/retro-food-5837090/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-03-26:/2009/03/26/2009-laughs-fish-again-5835048/kevinwilson2009-03-26T10:36:33+01:002009-03-26T10:36:33+01:00 <p><a title="fish 2" href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/fish_2/3354400"><img src="http://data5.blog.de/media/400/3354400_4be4b582f3_m.jpeg" alt="fish 2" hspace="5" vspace="5"></a></p> <p><img src="http://www.blog.co.uk/image/smileys/01arrow.gif" alt=""> i am getting complaints from the 'dignity for goldfish' movement so to avoid<br>expensive court action, this is the last fish joke of 2009.</p> <p> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/03/26/2009-laughs-fish-again-5835048/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-03-25:/2009/03/25/names-5831999/kevinwilson2009-03-25T23:33:04+01:002009-03-25T23:33:45+01:00 <p>2009  is a year of progress ... but there are exceptions.</p> <p>researchers have discovered that the number of british people with silly surnames like cock, death, balls and bottom have plummeted.</p> <p>sadly, people named Smellie decreased by 70 percent, Dafts by 51 percent, Gotobeds by 42 percent, Shufflebottoms by 40 percent, and Cockshotts by 34 percent.</p> <p>the research was conducted by professor of geography Ivor Biggun, apparently.</p> <p>personally, i think names like that should have a conservation order slapped on them.<br>either that, or they should all be elected to parliament.</p> <p>yours sincerely,</p> <p>max headroom</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/03/25/names-5831999/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-03-25:/2009/03/25/progress-report-5827948/kevinwilson2009-03-25T12:29:54+01:002009-03-25T12:29:54+01:00 <p>well, dear reader, we are now about a quarter of the way through the year of our kev 2009.</p> <p>as we are all in the business of life, this means it is high time we had a management meeting to discuss our quarterly figures.</p> <p>then we can decide whether we need to make changes, bob and weave a bit, scrap our plans and start again, or maybe just roll around the floor screaming.</p> <p>so far, i would give 2009 so far a score of about 75 per cent.  <br>i think i probably waste a bit TOO much time by calling it relaxation.<br>i need to create more time to do a bit more creative writing.<br>and i need to get busy on some DIY projects.<br>but other than that ...   i think the formula is</p> <p>MMIX = OK</p> <p> </p> <p><img src="http://www.blog.co.uk/image/smileys/01arrow.gif" alt=""> how's it going for you, would you say?</p> <p> </p> <p> </p> <p> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/03/25/progress-report-5827948/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-03-25:/2009/03/25/2009-laughs-5827548/kevinwilson2009-03-25T11:16:52+01:002009-03-25T11:16:52+01:00 <p><a title="fish" href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/fish/3351421"><img src="http://data5.blog.de/media/421/3351421_a602201005_m.jpeg" alt="fish" hspace="5" vspace="5"></a></p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/03/25/2009-laughs-5827548/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:my-2009.blog.co.uk,2009-03-24:/2009/03/24/night-moments-5823405/kevinwilson2009-03-24T23:27:07+01:002009-03-24T23:27:07+01:00 <p>the woodburner is flickering.<br>ruby the dog is snoozing and twitching her feet as she dreams.<br>outside a moment ago, i heard the toot of an owl.</p> <p>it's all telling me it's the end of the day.<br>but i don't feel at all sleepy even though it's been a loooooong day.</p> <p>a mug of tea and a good book sounds a good idea.</p> <p> </p> <p> </p> <p> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://my-2009.blog.co.uk/2009/03/24/night-moments-5823405/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>